To the man who stole my mother’s heart

I knew before I met you that you had to be special
because my mother was not one to ever settle.

She lived on her own for 20 years
Not really sure she had let go of all her fears.

She told me about you and that is when I knew
That the man of her dreams- well that was you.

She never thought that day would come
When she’d open heart despite the possible outcome

She found her true love, her white shinning knight
someone who shared that same bright light.

With drives and adventures all planned out
What was all this crazy talk about

Illness and disease so close, so near
Sometimes forgotten over the sound of laughter and cheer

It quickly caught up and upset the scale
 bringing with it, all that illness entails.

Your heart was full, and you were so soft spoken
I knew you never wanted to leave my mom heart broken.

But progressively you began to fade away
A wedding it is! with little delay

We celebrated the journey that lead us here
Perhaps shedding quite a few tears

Both slowly and quickly You began to decline
You held on, because you did not want to leave us all behind

We know now you are somewhere warm,
while we ride out the waves of grief like a storm.

You are somewhere loving, majestic with an incredible view
And remember dear Armand, that we will always love you.

 

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Waves Of Tranquility

Turquoise, aqua, azure, cobalt, sapphire
From depth to surface
Indistinguishable, interchanging
Flow of colour

Ever changing, immense, power
Always moving
Transforming
Forceful, influential, vigorous swells take you over and under

Witness the intertwining of souls below
Mingle, dance and express life
Beauty, serenity
Found under the natural movement of rapids

The peaks roll forward
And conceal the sand
As they turn into valleys.
Then as quickly as they approached, retreat.

Overwhelming sense of calm
Watch the shift
The gust of air flows past
The roar of the ocean

In silence
We find tranquility
Through repetition
We find peace

Composed like magnets

To nourish oneself with the origins 
To absorb the knowledge of the earth without supplement
Natural, unselfish and bountiful

Generations & evolution altered provisions
Chemically & biologically evident the virus

Metamorphosis in food creates metamorphosis in devourers
more ailments, illness, disease & affliction
where fear is the mastermind.

Realization of our patterns, our why
provides clarity and cures
we mature and flourish

Acceptance & love the path in our journey
obstacles perceived as enlightening rather than misfortunes
we grow, we learn we create

the purpose to choose
potent constructive thoughts
to create influential and inspiring behaviours in ourselves and others

we like a magnet attract similarity,
choose nourishing/loving thoughts &beliefs
and that is what will manifest.

The Sun rises again

Warmth dissipates,
life hushed and serene,
Dormancy, lethargy follow

Still lingers the impressions of scars,
buried just below the surface
As not to disturb.

Time may heal, but not regenerate
Nothing will ever be as it was exactly
Always slight remodeling, as time always moves forward.

Transformation is not instantaneous,
You are not one then the other
always a transition period – a period of in between.

We overcome challenge with persistence,
like a river leaves an impression on the bank,
not an easy task.

Time & movement propel forward
We grasp easy, clear, painless
Avoid existence of wounds.

In between is where we learn,
we develop,
our “flaws” turn into strengths.

We dove into this journey,
with knowledge of transcendence
But progression is imperceptible.

Nearest has difficulty to judge progress
perpetual movement forward inevitable
Happiness is on the horizon.

Transition almost complete
Sun heightens, intensifies
The dawning of a new day.

There is nothing more important than your community

For a long time I lived in a place where I felt like a stranger, I did not have much connection with others in the city where I lived. I felt so out-of-place and disconnected that I felt the need for a big change, and soon enough my whole life shifted.

I found my community in yoga studio in my hometown, Moksha Yoga Fredericton. It is in the heart of the city and for good reason. Teachers and students alike are open-hearted hippie warriors determined to create a beautiful loving atmosphere for themselves and anyone else who wants to be apart of it. It is an essential part of my life, as it provides relaxation, clarity, insight and a piece of happiness that you can not find anywhere else.

The community welcomed me with open arms on a frigidly cold day last February when I was asked to sub a yoga class on a lunch hour one Friday afternoon. I graciously accepted, having been given such a marvelous opportunity, sometimes your mind rapidly takes a swan dive into fear– well what if I am not good enough, what if my sequence isn’t right or challenging enough, the what ifs can be never-ending …  After that 60 minutes, those worries, anxieties and fears evaporated. I was where I was meant to be. You have all these like-minded people wanting to expand their knowledge of themselves and their abilities Just like what I have been searching for. Just like that, I clicked into place with all those other yogis, what I had been looking for, what I had been missing I finally found it. This yoga studio had filled that void that was left empty for so long.

Community is so important because it gives you a sense of belonging, they allow us to interact with like-minded individuals, share experiences, develop valued relationships that work towards a specific goal, and without community we live a pretty isolated, desolate life.  These are the people who surround your life and directly impact the person you become. As individuals we weave our spirits into everything that we do, whether we make a bracelet for a friend or a painting for a collector our spirit has imprinted on that object, same can be said for the people we spend our time with. They weave their spirits into ours and vice versa. With that being said it may alter your current situation- you may choose differently in the future but it may not change your situation at all.  Let the people that support, uplift, motivate to do better, be who you are and be the best you possible spend the most time with you because they will help you achieve success in all the areas of your life.

Get out there get involved, do something you love in your community to broaden your connections, your circle and your life.

Bad News Travels Fast

DCIM100GOPROWhen you wake up and receive some really awful news, it definitely does not help you get started on the right foot. I have been trying for almost two years to surface from this feeling of drowning, and today I felt like I was sinking just a little bit further into the depths.

My heart felt like it was being torn apart by ravaging wolves, and I just burst out into tears.

It is almost like every time I receive any kind of bad news this is what happens to me, and I know it is not the most normal response. For the last two years, I have been persevering despite not knowing or understanding exactly what was wrong with me. My parents brought it to my attention after the trauma of 2014.  PTSD became my diagnosis despite only being 26 years old, and probably one of the happiest people you will ever meet. A deep rooted fear creating havoc in my life all this time, and with no end in sight. I have been determined to overcome this obstacle in my life. However when I receive less than favorable news, I tend to feel this overwhelming sense of anger, frustration and above all fear.

So how do I manage that debilitating feeling that accompanies this kind of news? I meditate. Yes it is true, I sit on a cushion in silence. It brings me focused concentration, and answers. I sat today for 20 minutes in silence, focused on my breath and counting inhales/exhales and finally as the meditation came to a close, I imagined myself taking in warm, light radiant energy. This energy filled me, and dissolved my fears, worries, and troubles with each breath. The answers came to me- Go to yoga- go to Moksha, the hot room, where all those magical things happen, and so I did.

The movement of yoga helps my body rid itself of the poison my mind creates with fear, anger and frustration. It builds up in the muscles, and joints and creates pain in my lower back. I knew yoga class will help me work out the muscles in my back and I would feel better, but sometimes when you just can not take any more bad news you want to curl up on the couch, and watch movies all day long, not moving or seeing a single person. This is what I wanted to do when I woke up this morning, but after 60 minutes of present moment-pure bliss, my body felt 100% better.

I am so genuinely grateful for yoga and everything it has given me the last couple years, freedom of pain, love, community, happiness, stress relief, and of course transformation.